Thoughts of My Mom
April showers bring May flowers. And what do May flowers bring? Not pilgrims, as the old riddle goes…at least not to my mind. Even with the abundant super bloom this spring, my heart feels a yearning for something…someone I can’t see with my eyes or touch with my hands…at least not anymore.
As the month of May begins and Mother’s Day approaches, I long to be with my mom. To once again hear her voice. To sing with her as she plays the piano. To pray with her. To hear what she’s learned about our Lord Jesus. To study things about our loving God together.
When I was young, I thought my mom and I were quite different. When I grew up, I learned how similar we really were. People mistook my voice for hers on the telephone, and said that, when I sang, I sounded just like her. Living miles apart we chose the same color of the same brand of lipstick. We showed up at my youngest brother’s wedding wearing dresses made of the same fabric pattern, although they were very different in style. She loved nature and could name all of the unusual-to-me shrubs and cacti around her Arizona home. She loved watching the wildlife in her yard. And she loved Jesus with her whole heart.
As I experienced challenges in my life we spent more and more time together. We took mother/daughter vacations. I leaned on her. She became my best friend. She poured her faith in Jesus into me. My most cherished memory of those days was the year we spent going through How Can I Live, A Devotional Journey with Kay Arthur (©1982 by Kay Arthur, Published by Fleming H. Revell Company). I especially loved the focus for May: “The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want” and Psalm 23.
Now, every May, I pull out this beloved book, wipe off the dust, and reflect again on the incredible lessons I learned through the author, and also from my mom as we studied and shared our hearts with each other.
Mom first went on this devotional journey in 1983. On May 5 of that year, she went to an outpatient clinic for a breast biopsy, which proved to be malignant. In the book that morning, Kay Arthur told of a man who wrote from his prison cell, “There was no real hope of life…the only reality was my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Divested of all, He was to become everything to me…He was to break my bars and enlarge my coasts in the narrow room…He would make me glad with His countenance. He would let me hear His voice.” That day’s challenge was to answer the question, “What is your Shepherd like that He could so provide for you that you would not even want – no matter what…?”
As my precious mother faced the dark days of a very different prison cell, she wrote in the margins of her devotional book honest, raw emotions as she came to really understand the deep everlasting love of her Shepherd. A love that always seeks our highest good. “His sheep are in His hands, and those hands are hands of love. Nothing – not any situation or any person – can snatch us out of His hands (John 10:27)… Anything that comes into our lives…will be filtered through fingers of love. The sovereign God is a God of love. Whatever He does, whatever He permits is all in love”, Kay Arthur wrote on May 8.
And again on May 9, “He is there to complete that which He has begun, to make you into His image. This is His plan for you… So rest, little sheep, your Shepherd is there; He is in control. Whatever comes to you has been filtered through fingers of love, and it will serve to accomplish His purpose.” (Emphasis mine)
Mom and I both learned the truth of those words. We have both stood firm in our own fiery trials, knowing that our Good Shepherd was right here with us. Her example taught me that, “He would so provide for me that I would not even want – no matter what”. He did it for her so I knew He would do it for me! In the depths of our hearts and minds we were convinced that He would never leave us and His will would be accomplished in our lives, because we are His sheep.
Mom lived another 16 years following that initial battle with cancer, finally being called home by our Good Shepherd’s voice in 1999. I miss her terribly. But each May, as I travel again on this devotional journey with her, reading in her hand the words she spoke to this daughter she dearly loved, I’m comforted that she is with our loving, gracious Good Shepherd.
And I will see BOTH of them someday. I hope it’s soon.
Great Is Thy Faithfulness
“Great is Thy faithfulness. O God, my Father. There is no shadow of turning with Thee! Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not. As Thou hast been, Thou forever wilt be. Great is Thy faithfulness…” Thomas Chisholm
During my Bible study this morning I was studying chapters 9 and 10 of the Old Testament book of Zechariah. Chapter 9 speaks of the King that is to come, while chapter 10 speaks of the promised blessings in the day He comes (look at verses 6 – 12 for a taste of these rich and precious promises).
After studying the chapters we were asked, “Of the various ways that God will show compassion to His people, which is most meaningful to you personally, and why?”
I read through the list I’d written of what God had said He’d do for His people: strengthen, bring them back, make them glad, redeem them…
Then I looked at today’s date: April 28, 2019, one year to the day since Keith was infected with spinal meningitis and sepsis. Suddenly, I saw the three things that God has done in this past year, for which I have thanked Him over and over, and over.
I’ll strengthen and save My people.
They’ll sail through troubled seas and brush aside brash ocean waves.
I’ll make them strong, God-strong, and they’ll walk in My Name.
Since those frightening days at the hospital, not knowing if Keith would live or die, God has graciously granted us these three things. Keith was strengthened and miraculously saved. He sailed through troubled seas and Jesus calmed the storm. God made him strong and today Keith walks in His name.
In this past year Keith, besides returning to work in full health, has gone on to have a successful total knee replacement and just a week ago underwent a total hip replacement. God has again graciously granted us these three things, which has increased our faith in Him exponentially. And in the midst of these troubled seas and brash ocean waves, I, too, have been miraculously healed. Jesus touched me and healed me of Multiple Sclerosis this past summer. Jesus strengthened and saved me, first spiritually and now physically. He has made both of us strong, God-strong in every way and we both walk in the almighty, all-powerful name of Jesus.
Now I can’t wait for my Lord and King to come a second time, when I’ll be able to see Him with my own eyes and thank Him for all He’s done.
Great is Thy faithfulness, indeed!
How have you seen God’s faithfulness? I’d love to hear all of the ways He’s shown you compassion.
He’s in the Waiting
An incredible transformation happened in my garden last week and I had nothing to do with it!
I’ve been so busy driving to San Diego to help my dad and stepmom, while carrying out household chores at home. You see, Keith’s recovery from knee replacement went well, but now, unexpectedly, he’s having his hip replaced right before Easter. In the midst of this busyness the garden had to wait.
But do you know God is in the waiting? Even while the storms keep raging around us, He is working…underground, where we cannot see what He is doing, just as He does in our gardens. My only job in these times is to trust and remain obedient to what I know to be true of Him. If I can’t do anything else I can faithfully follow what I know He wants of me: “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him” (Psalm 37:7). Rather than being overwhelmed in weariness, I’ll fix my eyes on Jesus and rest. Trust. Wait.
“While we are waiting God is growing our faith, proving our love is for Him and not just for the answers He gives,” I journaled on 10.28.18.
When we least expect it, so we know that it’s truly from Him, He’ll do the totally unexpected: flowers bursting forth in bloom, gracing the gardens of our lives with dazzling beauty, refreshing fragrances, even sounds of singing birds, as life returns more vibrant than ever before.
Do you see it in your garden as I see it in mine? Have you seen the super bloom along the highways?
Are your eyes fixed on Jesus, watching and waiting for what He’s doing?
“See! The winter is past; the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come, the cooing of doves is heard in our land.” Song of Songs 2: 11-12
Oh yes, He’s in the waiting!