Our Ash Tree is Gone
As I sat on the porch this morning, the gaping hole where our beautiful ash tree once stood filled my heart with sadness.
I tried to “Be Still” and remember “In Your presence is fullness of joy,” but my spirit felt empty.
I began reading my devotionals when a flock of squawky parrots flew overhead. I watched them and thought, “They will never come to my home again. They will never be as close as they once were, when they’d light in the top branches of that majestic tree.”
As I watched, I saw I was not the only one feeling this loss. Several of them, at least four, flew in place directly overhead – as if they were searching for the tree that had always been there. The rest of the flock circled several times while those four flew in place, before they all moved on. Soon they landed across the street in our neighbor’s backyard tree. No longer here, but at least nearby.
Moments later I heard rustling and saw movement in the trees lining our other neighbor’s cinderblock wall. It was the little squirrel. Every other morning, he would run from our back deck, up onto our roof, then race over the whole house to the ash tree, where he would leap across the four-to-five-foot chasm. Landing safely in the tree, he’d climb down and go to our neighbor’s fruit trees. Already he had found a new route.
I, too, am finding that life goes on and that things are just different now. I am so grateful our Lord is constant. He never changes. He is our firm foundation. So, I’ll look to Him to replace what is missing, when the time is right.
Hebrews 13:8 “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.”
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(More thoughts/lessons on our Firm Foundation are still to come.)
The Bruised Blueberry Bush
“A bruised reed He will not break and a faintly burning wick He will not quench; He will faithfully bring forth justice.” Isaiah 42:3
Keith and I both love working in our gardens but we have very different gardening styles. I gently water, feed and nurture each plant, rejoicing in every tiny bit of new growth. Most mid-season pruning I do is light; more deadheading than cutting back. Keith is more the guerilla gardener, whacking back plants and pulling out anything that is underperforming. If a branch is broken due to one of us walking brusquely through the bushes, he either yanks it off or pulls out his snippers and immediately cuts it away. No patience or coddling from him with anything but his roses and plumeria. And even those aren’t always safe!
Last spring, I accidently broke a branch on my beloved blueberry bush as I carelessly moved the garden hose from one place to the next. I’m usually so cautious, but I was in a hurry and moved faster than I should have. So, I examined the branch closely to see if the wound was mortal or if I could coax it back to health. I couldn’t quite tell, so I decided to wait and see what would happen.
Day after day I watched it carefully. A week later I was quite surprised to see the branch hadn’t broken after all; it was just bent and badly bruised. The branch hadn’t been severed from the vine and was still fully alive. Berry buds were actually blossoming, and bees were even trying to pollinate them!
I took great joy in watching this bruised branch continue to flourish and guarded it carefully whenever I went near it. I was already pondering lessons relating to the “bruised reed” and how the Lord treats us, His children.
But remember, there are two gardeners at our house…with two differing gardening styles…
A couple of weeks later a neighbor visited us while Keith and I were working out front by the blueberry pots. (We have the greatest neighbors!) We stood and talked for a while, enjoying our conversation, but, as gardeners do, we were both surveying the land for what needed our attention. Suddenly, Keith reached down near where he was standing (which happened to be by the blueberry pot I’d been safeguarding) and YANKED that bruised branch right off the bush! Right in front of me!! Before I had a chance to step in and stop him!!
I was crushed.
“Why did you do that?!!” I asked.
“The branch was broken; it needed to come off,” he replied calmly.
“But I was watching it! I was pondering it! It was still blooming! God was using it,” I said.
“Well, it was dead,” he answered.
“It wasn’t before, but it sure is now,” I retorted. Our poor neighbor left soon thereafter.
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As I pondered the message God had for me in this turn of events, I wanted to be sure I was listening for His voice and not letting my thoughts get in His way. Among the many things I considered I kept coming back to these two points…
Jesus mends broken lives. As we’re on this journey through life we will be touched by sickness; the deaths of friends and loved ones; disappointments; betrayals; rejection; possibly even divorce. We may experience financial burdens and job losses; wildfires or car accidents. Things will be yanked from our lives. Jesus told us that as long as we’re in this world we’ll have tribulation. But He followed that statement with, “But take heart! I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33). When we put our faith in Him, trusting in His love and goodness, He will faithfully get us through the dark days in which we walk. And we will find that, when we’re on the other side of the pain, we are stronger, more compassionate and better able to help others going through similar trials find joy and strength in the Lord, as well as hope for the future.
He wants our refinement, not our ruin. When we’re His followers His desire is for us to look, act and think more like Him each day. He’s given us His mind; His Holy Spirit is living in us; and His word is available to us, helping us to grow into His image. When we choose to live His way, in His strength, His power is on display in us. In the process, as our trust in Him matures, we’re able to bear fruit regardless of our circumstances – even on bruised branches – causing those around us to wonder how that can be. (Remember, as Paul said, God’s power is perfected in weakness.)
However, since I don’t know where others are in this process, I want to be careful to nurture whenever appropriate. So, I will ask and trust the Lord to show me what I need to do to bring forth justice for those He puts in my life.
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Lord Jesus, thank you for overcoming this world and for helping us live transformed lives. Please show me how and when You want me to act on behalf of others, so Your justice prevails. Amen
Thoughts of My Mom
April showers bring May flowers. And what do May flowers bring? Not pilgrims, as the old riddle goes…at least not to my mind. Even with the abundant super bloom this spring, my heart feels a yearning for something…someone I can’t see with my eyes or touch with my hands…at least not anymore.
As the month of May begins and Mother’s Day approaches, I long to be with my mom. To once again hear her voice. To sing with her as she plays the piano. To pray with her. To hear what she’s learned about our Lord Jesus. To study things about our loving God together.
When I was young, I thought my mom and I were quite different. When I grew up, I learned how similar we really were. People mistook my voice for hers on the telephone, and said that, when I sang, I sounded just like her. Living miles apart we chose the same color of the same brand of lipstick. We showed up at my youngest brother’s wedding wearing dresses made of the same fabric pattern, although they were very different in style. She loved nature and could name all of the unusual-to-me shrubs and cacti around her Arizona home. She loved watching the wildlife in her yard. And she loved Jesus with her whole heart.
As I experienced challenges in my life we spent more and more time together. We took mother/daughter vacations. I leaned on her. She became my best friend. She poured her faith in Jesus into me. My most cherished memory of those days was the year we spent going through How Can I Live, A Devotional Journey with Kay Arthur (©1982 by Kay Arthur, Published by Fleming H. Revell Company). I especially loved the focus for May: “The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want” and Psalm 23.
Now, every May, I pull out this beloved book, wipe off the dust, and reflect again on the incredible lessons I learned through the author, and also from my mom as we studied and shared our hearts with each other.
Mom first went on this devotional journey in 1983. On May 5 of that year, she went to an outpatient clinic for a breast biopsy, which proved to be malignant. In the book that morning, Kay Arthur told of a man who wrote from his prison cell, “There was no real hope of life…the only reality was my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Divested of all, He was to become everything to me…He was to break my bars and enlarge my coasts in the narrow room…He would make me glad with His countenance. He would let me hear His voice.” That day’s challenge was to answer the question, “What is your Shepherd like that He could so provide for you that you would not even want – no matter what…?”
As my precious mother faced the dark days of a very different prison cell, she wrote in the margins of her devotional book honest, raw emotions as she came to really understand the deep everlasting love of her Shepherd. A love that always seeks our highest good. “His sheep are in His hands, and those hands are hands of love. Nothing – not any situation or any person – can snatch us out of His hands (John 10:27)… Anything that comes into our lives…will be filtered through fingers of love. The sovereign God is a God of love. Whatever He does, whatever He permits is all in love”, Kay Arthur wrote on May 8.
And again on May 9, “He is there to complete that which He has begun, to make you into His image. This is His plan for you… So rest, little sheep, your Shepherd is there; He is in control. Whatever comes to you has been filtered through fingers of love, and it will serve to accomplish His purpose.” (Emphasis mine)
Mom and I both learned the truth of those words. We have both stood firm in our own fiery trials, knowing that our Good Shepherd was right here with us. Her example taught me that, “He would so provide for me that I would not even want – no matter what”. He did it for her so I knew He would do it for me! In the depths of our hearts and minds we were convinced that He would never leave us and His will would be accomplished in our lives, because we are His sheep.
Mom lived another 16 years following that initial battle with cancer, finally being called home by our Good Shepherd’s voice in 1999. I miss her terribly. But each May, as I travel again on this devotional journey with her, reading in her hand the words she spoke to this daughter she dearly loved, I’m comforted that she is with our loving, gracious Good Shepherd.
And I will see BOTH of them someday. I hope it’s soon.